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22 Days - A Hesitant Frenzy

It's 2018. Hello there. Somewhat shocking that a year has gone by. One in which I decided to take a chance and study abroad. One that culminated in a quiet manner, only to drop back into school routine knowing that I had to count my minutes, and I am. Every day there are moments thinking of the what if's and the how come's in terms of France. During the past month I spent most waking moments searching for pleasant distractions to occupy the limited weeks I had at my disposal to live like I meant it. But now I'm here, the same month as I plan on stepping onto a New York bound flight, and then a second to Paris.

Living with purpose in these remaining three weeks gives me the opportunity to seek the most important tasks I have remaining, prior to takeoff. That means saying goodbyes, finishing finals early, and packing. For the first time in my life I already have begun the list for what I'm bringing along! (ask my mom - I'm the type of guy that shoves the first handful of clothes that I see into a suitcase and hope that I remembered underwear). And so it goes. Stress would seemingly be the first response to where I'm at, but now it feels different. I am now actively looking at what France might have in store, in anticipation and a load of nerves. On top of that, I recently learned who my host family is, and that I'll be living roughly 1.5 hours south of Paris in the farmlands, and I'm stoked. 3 weeks to go and I'm ready to brave the ensuing whirlwind!



Recent ski trip to whistler (above) 

Help... First I need to get there!

Thanks for visiting my blog! I’m Alex Wessel, currently a junior at Roosevelt High School in Seattle, WA. 

I moved back to Seattle in 2015 from San Miguel de Allende, Mexico 2 years ago. I was looking forward to a world I knew, including the easy comfort of the American education system, especially after having an unsettling plethora of experiences way outside of my comfort zone for two years in another country and another language.

At the end of our time in Mexico 2015

I never fully understood until more recently, that my parents moved us to Mexico because they were committed to my sister and me being engaged in a greater international community, beyond the comfortable social bubble I knew. I thought they were just crazy. I'm just now beginning to understand the full value of an international experience. 

The last couple of years back in Seattle, I immersed myself in a lot of sports ---soccer, tennis, rowing, skiing. I ski instructed, tutored and took on neighborhood work. Socially I’ve been involved in youth group, clubs, and have had a couple of girlfriends. Academically, my classes were fine, but not particularly challenging. One theme has been consistent – not much has really stuck, my choice of activities are always changing. My youth group has been the one rock solid core that kept me going.

Youth group trip to Tijuana to build a house Spring 2017

Freshman year I spent adjusting to high school, bouncing around from person to person even just trying to find a crew to eat lunch with. I changed soccer teams twice that year, split in the middle with playing tennis.

Sophomore year was much the same. I changed premier club soccer teams, then started rowing in the early spring season to gain strength and discipline, ski instructed and started tutoring. Clubs at school didn't resonate with me. I felt like all this bouncing around was beginning to equate to a lack of direction and time poorly spent. I didn't have goals that suited what I needed at the time.

I'm in the white hat

This school year has proven different, significantly tougher, from my previous two. Since summer, my life plunged in an unfulfilling and unexpected direction. Being a junior and senior at Roosevelt is centered around the leadership positions, the varsity sports teams, and the parties. I’ve found myself in a spot where I’m not satisfied with the ongoing pressures to conform.

The only thing that kept me going was my close-knit youth group. But at the start of the school year and out of my control, that changed too. I was totally crushed and my life turned crappy quickly. The story is long and complicated, but at the heart of it is a breach of trust stemming from someone really important to me. It’s hurt my relationships with friends, youth group leaders, and my parents too. I’ve been running into a brick wall, doing it again and again, to a point where it’s becomes routine.

Ironically after bouncing around so much, I’ve come to the conclusion that indeed change is what’s needed once again. But this time, it’s aimed at the target of happiness beyond my high school years. A couple of weeks ago one very late night my mom sat me down to talk about studying abroad. My instinctual response was yes! My quick decision surprised my mom and me too. So we’ve been scrambling to make this happen.

As a result, I'm heading to France with AFS. I feel like studying abroad will provide both the challenge and the time to draw a bigger picture for my life in a new setting. I expect the benefits of learning more French (I've been studying it for 3 years), adjusting to the culture, making new relationships and spending time getting to know myself better will result in something positive.

As part of my France experience, I plan to blog regular ponderings --- any thoughts that have crossed my mind to share with readers. I’d also like to provide a visual with a video every month. As an avid videographer and drone pilot, I think a video would give better insight to friends and family on the vibe and my new life in France. 

I’m looking forward to this, but I’m really anxious too. I’m scared to leave my family, my friends and the stuff I like about my life here. In France, I’ll be living with a host family but may not know who they are or where in France I’ll be until shortly before leaving middle of January. This is all happening very fast.

I’ve promised my parents I’ll raise ½ the fee especially since this has all come up so last minute. It’s not cheap. I’d really appreciate your support. Any amount helps me know you’re in this journey with me. I'll keep you updated and thank you!

• Alex

What is the sponsor an AFSer program? 

Sponsor an AFSer is an online fundraising tool provided by AFS-USA to allow potential contributors to make easy, secure, and non tax-deductible contributions to my AFS program fee.

To sponsor my AFS program, please click the Donate Now button to make a non tax-deductible contribution directly to my AFS program account.

Looking for a host family!

AFS is actively looking for a host family for me. They've interviewed me to find out what would be important for a good match. We can help AFS in the hunt for a host family. Maybe it will even come through a friend of a friend. So just in case, I'm sharing a letter I wrote introducing myself to a possible host family. I realize I need to write it in French too. I'll get there!

If you have any ideas of people I should connect with in France, let me know. 

Hi Host Family,

I'm Alex Wessel. I've recently began to think about what it is that drives me. The fuel to my fire so to speak. Over the past several years, I've come to believe that it is traveling and meeting people from different places. I am fascinated that traveling serves as a medium to challenge myself, adventure, and pick up new friends and life experiences along the way. Recently I have struggled with the American ideals of an ethnocentric education, a pipeline that I see leads me to live a life I’m not seeking. It has been a little over two years since I returned from a two-year experience living in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico, and I think it’s a good time to transition to a new experience abroad. The daily balancing act of school, soccer, youth group, and videography has been good, but I’m looking to stretch myself more.

I’ve attended Roosevelt High School in Seattle since 9th grade. I’m currently an ambitious 11th grader, and have a job as a tutor, and as ski-instructor in the winter (I'd like to say more of a ski-bum). This past summer, I traveled to Lake Shasta in California to be a youth counselor to younger high schoolers, led a group of my peers on a backcountry camping trip, took a family road trip to Yellowstone National Park, and climbed Mt. Zion on a week-long backpacking trip in British Columbia, Canada. Clearly, I love the outdoors, staying active, and pushing myself outside of my comfort zone. This past spring, I traveled to Tijuana, Mexico on a housebuilding trip with my youth group. It was there that I refreshed my passion for immersing myself in other cultures.

Something important to know about me is that I am a deep-thinker, and often need lots of time to think about experiences. Usually I look for a creative outlet to spend time processing, and that has primarily been in the fields of writing and videography. Writing clears my mind because time and time again I have trouble communicating how I truly feel in the moment. So giving myself the second chance to analyze and build on situations has been vital in my development throughout high school. Secondly, my love for videography has been around since I bought my first camera in middle school, and it helps me express myself. I ‘d want to continue both pursuits with studying abroad, as I would hope to find inspiration in the unique aspects of daily life.

I’m ready for this experience as I’m seeking more independence. I’m sure my family will miss me (and maybe I’ll even miss them!) but as travelers, the distance between us is short. For my time abroad, I’d really like to see how I can contribute to a host family and look forward to learning from them whatever part of their lives they’re willing to share with me!

Thanks for your time. I’m of course happy to share more!

Alex